The air tonight makes us feel a bit melancolic. Eventhough this girl has a bright pink hair and a romantic color dress, her heart has a dark color. Let’s call her Trixie. She is a university student. She is a bit tired with everything, her life, her daily activities, her environment and herself.
Perhaps she ask too much for herself. Perhaps she just isn’t patient. Perhaps she is just too ambitious. We never know what happen to her or why she feel what she feel. But one thing’s for sure, she doesn’t want to give up today. She feels tired but she doesn’t want to give up. She thinks, that dark feeling will go away soon. So today, she fight that feeling with pink dress, white converse and baby blue sling bag.
Lets call her Anna. She is a serious lady who think about her life as a precious thing. She think that this life worth living, enough fun, enough problem. She is smart and diligent. She like to clean the house, especially her bathroom because that place is her sanctuary. She can ber herself the most when she is alone in her bathroom. She sing, think, and dance in her bathroom.
Today she wants to feel bold but calm, so she choose a brown shirt and skirt. Wear a peeptoe ankle heels and you’ll feel strong.
What to wear with sleeveless white shirt? Since I always love preppy look, I’ll combine it with pink Aline skirt, grey oxford shoes and grey sling bag. This is only for they who see the world as a fun and magical place.
“What to do with this fear about my future?”
Every day I always confuse because there are so many things to think about such as how to get there, what to eat, what to wear, when to laundry my clothes, what to draw, what to write, how to maintain my hair, how to do this things, what is the best color/font/layout for this project?
Last month I resign from my job because I move to another place. I move from Jakarta to Bali to pursue my passion in Art, Fashion and Small Business. And right now I’m learning about Graphic Design, building my small business, writing and looking for a new job. Too little time, too many to do.
Anyway too much to think about makes my head hurt. These are what I do when I am confuse :
- Do nothing, just sit in total silent like a stupid person,
- Browsing for solutions which is makes me more confuse because there are too many information,
- Ask people and think again whether their suggestion is right or not,
- Reading manga, fanfic, scrolling at instagram, or open 9gag because I give up thinking.
- Drawing. Create something. At least if I don’t have an answer, I have a good illustration. I create something. There is an output. I am not a useless person!
- Comparing solutions by money and benefit/value.
- Sleep because the night has come and let tomorrow give me solutions.
How about you? Let’s share and discuss about it.
Pillow Art by Maria Biro. I like the Art because it feels like hope.
Most of the time, many times in a day there is always laziness. I always being lazy, especially when you are in bed with your phone, the temperature is cold, rain outside. Total laziness. How can I refuse such temptation. But there is something I should do and I feel guilty if I don’t do something. Lazy >> Procrastination >> Guilt, not a good combination to enjoy my time.
I have a dream to be a discipline person but somehow I failed, not yet success. I create some indicators of good self-discipline such as clean-tidy room, clean clothes, healthy body shape, routine blog post. Thanks to my laziness I only achieve some of them. So I wonder, how to stop being lazy? Why am I lazy?
- Perhaps I don’t think that clean my room is important, and I am fine with a bit of messy room.
- Perhaps I don’t want to be healthy.
- Perhaps I pity my self, so anything I do is useless (pessimism).
- Perhaps I run away from reality.
- Perhaps I believe laziness is part of my personality.
Perhaps there are more reasons but all I know is laziness makes me hate myself. I hate hating myself. This feels like evil circle. Anyway after I realize this, I think I should evaluate again my core belief. What I believe about myself, about the future, about this world. Next what is the solution? I googling about this, read self help books and execute some ideas. These are things that I find useful :
- Snap and do. Literally snap and wake up. do something you want to do. If this is not enough…
- Tell yourself that all it need is just 2 minutes. Whatever you do, set time limit of 2 minutes. Why 2? Because it is short. The magic is here : when you do something in 2 minutes, most of the time your job is not finish and all you want to do is finish it. Like when you did a test in school, the time is up, you still tried to finish up until the Teacher take away your paper. But if the task is more challenging like do something to pursue your dream…
- Go to step 1. This step is definitely not enough so…
- If negative thinking and feeling come, realize that those thought comes from fear and those feeling come from your believe, endure and tell yourself “this too will pass”.
But I still think that changing my core belief will be more useful. There are many suggestions to do it. I’ll share about it later, which suggestions give the best result.